Let’s say your goal is healthier living, whether it’s weight loss, less caffeine or alcohol, or a stronger, more toned physique.
No, you don’t need to become Pollyanna to be healthy. You do need to
be accepting of what IS in this moment, while making the effort to change the things you can. These ideas come from a philosophy called ACT—acceptance and commitment therapy. In ACT we Accept, Choose and Take Action (ACT) .
Remember you can only start from where you are, not where you would like to be.
ACT is all about living our lives in alignment with our deeply held
values. Many of us say that we place a high value on health,
confidence, happiness, and connectedness with others; but we’re not
consistently doing the things that lead us there. It’s hard to do sometimes,
especially when we hit one of life’s speed bumps or obstacles along
the way.
Let’s say you’re on a
HealthyWage challenge to lose weight. Reframing sabotaging thoughts (see examples below) and changing the
things you can change will help you stay the course of your wellness goals,
EVEN when you hit a bump.
You can learn not to take your negative reactions to stressors so
seriously. After all, they are just thoughts in a moment in time. You
can observe your emotional reactions and still ACT in accordance
with your values.
So “This is too hard” becomes “Yes, it feels hard to get to the gym today,
but I know once I start pedaling I’m likely to feel better, and that’s important to me.”
ACCEPT your feelings, and CHOOSE to ACT in accordance with your values (feeling better inside and out).
The energy you’ve typically put into feeling guilt, shame, doubt,
worthlessness, and hopelessness when something difficult happens can
be put into positive actions that move you closer to the prize—better
health and maybe some dollars too!
You will still have negative thoughts and emotions—that’s being
human. The difference is you can have them without the usual
self-sabotaging behaviors that have typically accompanied them. You can
feel lonely, bored, scared or whatever resulted in your mindlessly
munching on a whole bag of cookies in the past. A healthy response
is to acknowledge those feelings and surf the urges and cravings
(compassionately observe them) without giving in to them.
Yes, your feelings and food cravings will pass if you don’t feed them.
Doing so will give you confidence.
Start by defining what you want your life to be:
Is your daily behavior consistent with your values? The good news is
that IS what IS in your control.
Learn to step back and observe your automatic emotions in response to
stressful events rather than being consumed by them (and consuming
food/alcohol to numb them out).
Remove the self-limiting beliefs that stand in the way of your living a life you value.
Act in ways that promote better results for you. You may have to
behave in ways that are opposite to how you’ve been acting. It’s
likely to be uncomfortable at first.
Keep your eye on the prize at all times.
Do you need an attitude adjustment to get there?
When the prize is weight loss and improved health and well-being, here are some ways to reframe your thinking:
Go from: “I have too much weight to lose—I’ll never be able to do it” to
“I CAN always lose 5 pounds” (a way to break down larger weight loss goals
into manageable chunks).
Reframe, “I don’t care,” to “I’m feeling overwhelmed today, but I do still value
being able to hike with my friends, so I’m going to meet them at the trailhead like I said I would.”
Acknowledge the thought, “Life is rough, I’m going to treat myself
today,” and remind yourself that cupcakes are a mistreat not a treat.
“Treating myself means lowering my stress—I’ll go for a massage
instead.”
“I don’t feel like it,” can be looked at through a more positive lens—”Even
though I don’t feel like it, I can do it anyway—it’s when I need it the most.”
Don’t let failed past diet attempts derail your efforts now.
Take it as a call to action to do something different than you’ve done before.
The greatest discovery of my generation is that a human being can
alter his life by altering his attitudes. ~William James
Keep your eye on the prize at all times. You are your values…live them!!!
The ACT ideas in this blog were adapted from
The Mindfulness and Acceptance Workbook for Depression by Strosahl and Robinson.
Have a great week!
-Ellen
Ellen Resnick is a psychotherapist in private practice in San Francisco and Redwood City, California. She specializes in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and incorporates the use of mindfulness into the treatment of depression, anxiety, and emotional overeating. She runs a holistic weight loss program called Center for Thoughtful Weight Loss,
www.thoughtfulweightloss.com. You can email Ellen at
ellen@thoughtfulweightloss.com and follow her on Twitter at @thoughtfullellen.
Copyright © 2011 Ellen N. Resnick, LCSW
